‘And the example of those who seek other than Allah, is like the example of the spider who builds for itself a house; and indeed, the weakest house is that of the spider, if only they knew.’ (Qur’an: 29:41)

When smouldering tears ran dry
Yet the anguish would not subside,
When sorrow scavenged all peace
Leaving my heart gaunt with grief,
I realised

When I saw my dreams, my goals
One by one, disintegrate, dissolve
When I thought my insides would explode
A volcano of shattered hopes,
I realised

When I was with people but utterly forlorn,
Smiling, composed, as loneliness gnawed my soul
When I struggled to find the eye of serenity
In the storm of my soul’s duplicity,
I realised

When I was inflamed by anger and pain
Suffering injustice, paying for others’ mistakes
When I struggled to forbear, forgive, forget
Keep my resentment in check,
I realised

When death claimed a friend
And sorrow overwhelmed
When loss deprived me of sleep,
Focus, energy, peace,
I realised

I realised what in ease, I never perceived
How needy I was, vulnerable, utterly weak!
How arrogant, foolish, to think I could manage myself
Suffice as my own master, compass and friend!

No wonder I was haunted by fear, broken by pain
Consumed by anger, drowning in despair
I tried to go it alone – alone I was bound to fail

I realised all strength and solace flow from one Source
So why seek peace in desire’s futile course?
If I truly empty and open my heart, only for Him
All strength, peace, and joy will surely flood in

Anon