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29th Jan 2016

My boss is a funny creature. She’s half my size and walks around like she owns the place. I don’t commute to work, and I am fully – as in 24/7- dedicated to my job. My boss occasionally kicks and screams when she doesn’t get her way, which is hilarious as it is disturbing. I love my chosen vocation – I’m a stay at home mother and proud of it.

My mother stayed at home when I was growing up and my husband’s mother did the same. Both of us wanted the same for Nabeelah and couldn’t imagine it any other way. I empathise with mothers who need to go back due to financial or other reasons; it must be a very difficult juggle. However, I find it hard to swallow when my peers feel that staying at home is the easier option. It’s just as hard and draining – with no end in sight – and only the strong belief that this is the best for my child keeps me going

Going to work with its set predictable routine and monthly paycheques is worlds apart from what it is like staying at home…There is no predictability. You find yourself in a continuous auto-clean mode, no monthly mother appreciation day or even an end of the day guaranteed hug. The shift from a working woman to a stay at home mother has been one of the biggest changes in my life, and by far the most peaceful decision I have made to date.

I have realised children do not wait for us to grow up, they do so with or without our presence. And it is precious time and moments – that ultimately make children worth having – that you miss out when work beckons. Quality time is not something that can be scheduled. It comes and goes with no rhyme or rhythm. It’s like gold digging; you’ll get minuscule amounts in a greater amount of mud.

Although I miss out on the solid clear cut outcomes of the working world, staying at home gives me the blessing of unhurried time with Nabeelah. I strongly feel children need our time, lots of it, and I, as her mother, am in a position to unconditionally give time, love and education that no other person can. I wish to maximise on that fact, knowing I have limited time before she heads out to school and the big bad world without me by her side.

I understand that financial situations of our time require more and more women to head back to work, but as a mother I’m holding tight to this exclusive time with Nabeelah in her first few formative years. I strongly feel that the benefits of mothers staying at home for their children, although intangible, far outweigh the benefits of mothers returning to work.

Aasiya I Versi

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